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Man On Internet Almost Falls Into World Of DIY Mustard Enthusiasts

The Onion - Photos — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 19:00:20 +0000

Steve Gibson sits at a desk that was once covered with mustard paraphernalia.

Man On Internet Almost Falls Into World Of DIY Mustard Enthusiasts

The Onion - Photos — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 19:00:20 +0000

Steve Gibson sits at a desk that was once covered with mustard paraphernalia.

Man On Internet Almost Falls Into World Of DIY Mustard Enthusiasts

The Onion - Photos — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 19:00:20 +0000

Steve Gibson sits at a desk that was once covered with mustard paraphernalia.

(CHN) Flashback: Dos Equis Man Fired Following Adult Diaper Revelation

Seth — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 18:25:00 +0000

The ‘Most Interesting Man In The World’ finally brought down by lack of colon control.

by: Victoria Wells CHN Business Stuff. 9:25 AM EST

Los Angeles, CA: He lives vicariously through himself, causes rainfall with his sadness, and keeps a telephone book around just so he can tear it in half; but none of this mattered early Monday morning when actor Jonathan Goldsmith was let go after Dos Equis executives learned that anal leakage had forced the 74 year old actor to begin using adult incontinence diapers on a daily basis.

Goldsmith, a lifelong bit actor, landed the Dos Equis Campaign in 2006 and “passed every physical evaluation necessary” according to agent Tom Rosenburg. The fuss began when a blogger from Encino, CA spotted Goldsmith buying an issue of ‘Home and Garden’ magazine, a carton of Virginia Slims, and two dozen Tranquility Brand “Premium Overnight Protective Underwear” in a Southern California Ralph’s Grocery Store. Mr. Rosenburg plans to file a wrongful termination suit stipulating that “no man should lose his job simply because liquid and solid waste dissipates uncontrollably from a bodily orifice.” He added, “If such a standard were acceptable then how could anyone defend the hiring of Chris Harrison, host of ABC’s The Bachelor“.

Dos Equis tried to dismiss the story as a hoax but soon realized that Jonathan Goldsmith was nothing more than a liability after parent company Heineken USA was served with a class action filing suggesting that ‘Dos Equis’ contained a type of barley long thought to increase estrogen levels and already proven as a non-reversible laxative by the FDA in 1984.

“It’s a sad day for beer drinkers across America” remarked 19 Year old College of The Canyons freshman Michael Ortiz as he sat clinging to an empty cardboard case of Dos Equis while patiently receiving a pedicure. “I don’t believe the accusations; what I do believe is that the man who is both right handed and left handed, whose blood smells like cologne, who once taught a German Shepherd to bark in Spanish is alive and well with a firm and capable sphincter … he’s probably somewhere on an island that he discovered while fishing for sharks with his bare hands.”

The Comedy Hub Netword (CHN) Archives

I Didn’t Spend 6 Weeks In A Medical License Reinstatement Ethics Class To Have You Call Me ‘Mister’

The Onion - Photos — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 16:00:34 +0000

It’s tragic how people treat doctors in this day and age. The lack of respect for the education and training medical professionals go through,…

Couple Of Cool Guys Just Hanging Out

The Onion - Photos — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 14:00:03 +0000

NEW BRUNSWICK, NJ—Cool guys Shawn Goldstein, 26 (left) and Walt Traxel, 26 (right) just hang out Tuesday…

Soap: The Comedy TV Show

Fitzgerald — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 08:01:00 +0000

Growing up back in the 70s, one of my favorite comedy TV shows was “Soap”. It was a type of comedy that is hard to explain, you really just have to watch it to understand.

Wikipedia describes it as;

The show was created as a parody of daytime soap operas, presented as a weekly half-hour long primetime comedy. Like a soap opera, the show’s story was presented in a serial format and included melodramatic plot elements such as amnesia, alien abduction, demonic possession, murder, and kidnapping. In 2007 it was listed as one of Time magazine’s “100 Best TV Shows of All-TIME.”

The show is truly one of the best comedies of all time! Great actors showing great comedic timing, and it had some great plot twists that kept us coming back to watch.

Soap: The Complete Series (Slim Packaging)

click on image for info

Michelle Obama’s First Lady Arms

Fod Team — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 02:18:45 +0000

Michelle Obama’s First Lady Arms 2:09

Michelle Obama shows off her amazing new arm workout to keep those arms in shape.

Submitted by: Fod Team

Kinda Cute

Keywords: michelle obama barack workout goop gwyneth paltrow arms workout arms back muscles buff tone toning

Views: 1,964

Breaking News: Some Bullshit Happening Somewhere

TubularGoldmine — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 08:46:16 +0000

Breaking News: Some Bullshit Happenin… 2:01

This is some must see news footage of some amazing bullshit happening, they even have an old man witness.

Submitted by: TubularGoldmine

Kinda Cute

Keywords: breaking news news report reporters cnn reasons experts scientist school news bear cats dogs dog

Views: 10,706

Up In The Air with George Clooney

Fitzgerald — Wed, 10 Mar 2010 08:01:00 +0000

I recently saw “Up In The Air” with George Clooney. I thought it was a very funny movie. It covers some really interesting themes, like the connections that we all make with each other. And how we do our jobs, our work, and what that says about us. And even though these are heavy themes, the movie does a wonderful job of making it very funny.

Having laid people off, and having been laid off myself, I think I understand the pain that goes with losing your job. Never thought I would be able to laugh at that, but this smart and funny movie does just that.

Stars George Clooney as Ryan Bingham and Vera Farmiga as his love interest Alex.

Up in the Air

click image for info

Up in the Air [Blu-ray]